Beetlejuice With a Scholarship
Some days I act like a gremlin (or goblin in your D&D language) that goes “Grrragbh!” and shuffles back and forth after he got out his cage. Other times? I can be as sophisticated as a person who graduated from Harvard or Yale, and this is my line:
“If you wanted, I could be like Beetlejuice with a scholarship from Yale in Haunting and Being a Clown. Honestly, I’m quite proud of this.”
🎭 Real-Time Reactions
Workplace → Nervous laughter, confused glances, someone mutters “What?” under their breath.
Casual Hangout → Big laughs, someone repeats it back later as an inside joke.
Confrontation → Silence, awkward stare, opponent blinks like they just got rattled by a non-sequitur grenade.
📜 Variants
Full Line (Theatrical):
“If you wanted, I could be like Beetlejuice with a scholarship from Yale in Haunting and Being a Clown. Honestly, I’m quite proud of this.”
Lite Version (Casual Throw):
“Think Beetlejuice… but with a Yale degree. Proud of it.”
Razor-Cut Version (Six-Word Drop):
“Beetlejuice. Yale. Clowning’s my major.”
🕹️ How to Use
Drop it once. Never explain it.
Works best when someone expects seriousness, then you pull the rug out.
Don’t milk it — the power’s in the timing.
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