🎥 TRAILER: CHUCKY vs GREMLINS — TOY STORE LOCKDOWN
Filed under: Dept. of Petty Affairs / Trash Cinema Audit / Holiday Warfare
[Fade in — snow-covered mall parking lot]
A flickering neon sign: “Toys! For All Ages.”
Jingle bells twist into static.
NARRATOR (rough 80s trailer voice):
“This holiday season… the toys aren’t on the nice list.”
A candy cane drips blood.
CHUCKY (off-screen):
“Ho. Ho. Holy hell.”
A Good Guy box creaks open.
Something skitters in the dark.
NARRATOR:
“One’s a killer doll with attitude…” [Chucky spins a knife like a baton.] “…the other’s a swarm of chaos with teeth.” [Gremlin bites through a light wire — sparks.]
Industrial remix of “Carol of the Bells” kicks in.
TITLES FLASH
🎄 SILENCE IS BROKEN 🧨 THE AISLES ARE ARMED 🔪 SANTA’S ON STRIKE
CHUCKY:
“Let’s deck the freakin’ halls!”
MONTAGE
- Gremlins hijack a drone wrapped in tinsel.
- Chucky drives a toy tank through a pile of Tickle-Me-Elmos.
- Tiffany shrieks from a shattered TV: “GET ’EM, BABY!”
- A Gremlin smashes a snow globe and grins through the shards.
NARRATOR:
“From the studio that brought you Freddy vs Jason…
and the nightmares you grew up with…”
Silence. Flickering lights.
Then — Chucky and a Gremlin tackle each other into a fireworks display.
NARRATOR (growl):
“This Christmas… the toys fight back.”
CHUCKY (yelling):
“It’s beginning to look a lot like MURDER!”
Red and green fireworks explode through store windows.
TITLE CARD
🎥 CHUCKY vs GREMLINS: TOY STORE LOCKDOWN
TAGLINE:
“Small. Savage. Seasonal.”
Gremlin giggle overlaps Chucky’s laugh.
GREMLIN: “Heh heh heh!”
CHUCKY: “That’s my line!”
Logo burns in like wrapping paper catching fire.
Filed and screened by the Dept. of Petty Affairs, Horror Licensing Division.
Popcorn not included — only casualties.
— Jerry “ The Ankle Biter ” Silverhand · Tribunal Chair, Dept. of Petty Affairs · Glitch Council Liaison
Motto: Don’t bark — bill.
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