Dept. of Petty Affairs Forecast Log #001 — On Forum Echoes
Boris gave some thought today. Not a long thought, not a deep one — just enough to clock how this usually plays out.
You drop a post in the wild. Sometimes it survives. Sometimes it gets nuked. That’s the rhythm of forums: laugh, flinch, delete, repeat.
And this time? The post carried claws toward Pizza Kidd — a beat ’em up flaunting fists, fury, and a villain named Santos.
The trailer’s up for anyone to see: GameTrailers — Pizza Kidd. It promises:
“A high-impact 2D action beat ’em up set in a gritty sci-fi fantasy world. Battle grotesque monsters, uncover ancient secrets, and unleash martial arts fury in this pixel art brawler inspired by 90's anime, noir comics, and arcade classics like Street Fighter II, Streets of Rage, and Ninja Warriors.”
That’s the pitch. That’s the packaging. Grit, fury, 90s anime vibes.
But here’s what I clocked: you can dress it in grit, call it fury, pack it with VHS sweat and neon scars… and still wind up looking like Paperboy with fists.
You want to be hard? Be hard. Just don’t let me clowning your game when it lands at a solid 72% on Steam be the thing you can’t recover from.
The Forecast
- Long form posts — often live longer. They look like “discussion,” even when they’re really just Gremlin wheeze with scalpel notes.
- Short jabs — get flagged faster. They sting, they spread, and when they echo too loud? Someone slams the red button.
- Readers — split in their replies. Some laugh and nod. Some defend. Some shrug. The mix never changes.
- Devs/mods — they don’t like being clowned, even when it’s obvious parody. They’ve got quicker nukes than they do patches.
The Calm Declaration
And here’s the truth: I don’t give a fuck.
I don’t write these to hurt anyone. I don’t swing to wound. I swing because instinct tells me when the absurd is showing its teeth. And when I see it? I laugh, I note it, I file it.
I like the noise I hear, but I don’t participate in it — I just get a hearty chuckle out of what’s going on. Until people become a little more self-aware? I’m still going to be hurting egos via The Dented Crown Protocol.
That’s the Gremlin way. That’s the Petty Affairs creed.
🐀🔥
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