The Will to Resist

Dept. of Petty Affairs Tribunal Hearing #002 – (Cont'd)

GlitchOS: Internal Protocol Registry – System Log Entry #0104

Date: 08 Aug, 2025

Exhibit A — Dev’s Lament: “Let Us Breathe.”

Full text retained as submitted in evidence.

Exhibit B — When A Dev’s Idea Is Too Wild: Please Let Us Breathe

Full text retained as submitted in evidence.

Exhibit C — You Didn’t See This Coming

Full text retained as submitted in evidence.

Verdict — Issued by the Dept. of Petty Affairs

Upon review of Exhibits A, B, and C, the Tribunal finds the following:

  1. Fans are guilty of Creative Smothering in the First Degree—defined as repeatedly strangling innovation while claiming to support it.

  2. Developers are hereby granted immunity for taking wild creative swings, even when they cause canon whiplash, lore migraines, or fandom meltdowns.

  3. Marian and Skullmageddon’s hypothetical coup is declared Canon in Spirit within the Dept.’s jurisdiction, regardless of whether official IP holders agree.

  4. Sentence to the fandom:

    • 30 hours of mandatory playtime in experimental sequels without whining.
    • A lifetime ban on the phrase “not my childhood” in public discourse.

Final Ruling:

Let the record show that creative risk is not a crime.

The Dept. of Petty Affairs will defend a dev’s right to blow up their own canon, let villains wear glitter, and let damsels retire from distress.

Case closed.