Dept. of Petty Affairs Tribunal Hearing #003
Dept. of Petty Affairs — Tribunal Hearing #003
Filed by: Jerry “The Ankle Biter,” in the presence of Mr. & Mrs. Catford.
Case: Selective Menace Protocol – Confirmed.
Findings: The accused (Boris Thuginski) does not engage in reckless striking. Instead, targets are chosen with precision—those whose rot has been visible, unchecked, and undeserving of mercy.
Testimony:
“Mr. and Mrs. Catford, you see it too. I’m not running wild here—I’m a selective menace. I don’t waste claws on strays. I save my bite for the ones who really earn it—the ones rotting in plain sight, thinking no one’s going to drag them out into the daylight.
When I move, it’s not for sport. It’s correction. I’m the audit they never planned for, the ledger check they thought they could dodge.
And yeah… I’ll grin while I do it. Not because I’m cruel, but because there’s satisfaction in knowing I’m the one who pulled the plug.
We don’t just walk away from that—we leave the pawprints on the scene.”
Verdict: Selective menace status: Affirmed. Future action: Proceed with measured precision; claws remain sharp.
[Dept. of Petty Affairs Official Seal – Mr. & Mrs. Catford Pawprint Approved]
CASE CLOSED ✅