Gremlin Risitas Entry #001 — The Layoff Clap

29 Aug, 2025

Based on Xbox layoffs clip

[Gremlin sits down with wine, already chuckling]

Act I: Hulk’s Stage

Hulk Reviewz comes out swinging, all caps energy:

• “It is an absolute bloodbath with Xbox.”
• “Microsoft not dead, Microsoft not declining!”
• “9,000 layoffs not big deal!”
• “Stocks went up after the firings—see, proof of success!”
• “Elon Musk did the same thing with Twitter, still working fine.”
• “Too many cooks in the kitchen! Phil Spencer is 4D chess brain!”

For seven minutes Hulk paces the stage, pounding his chest. Studios gutted, people out of work, Call of Duty teams losing staff—yet the line is the same: this isn’t decline, this is efficiency.

Every dismissal framed as smart business. Every lost paycheck dressed up as proof of corporate strength.

And at the end, Hulk throws down the challenge:

“Subscribe. Let Hulk know in comments. Do you think Hulk right? Do you think Hulk full of [__]? Hulk out.”

The booth is set. The iron props are braced. The crowd claps.

Act II: The Gremlin’s Chair

And then… wine glass clinks. 🥂

I slip into the comment section, cigar smoke curling from my grin.

“Wild how people cheer layoffs like it’s 4D chess. 9,000 humans cut loose, families rattled, futures trashed — but hey, stocks went up, right? That’s the game now: bloodbath gets spun as ‘efficiency.’ We could’ve built better, treated talent like something other than disposable cogs. Instead? We clap while the guillotine falls, then wonder why every new release feels hollow.”

“It ain’t about Xbox dying. It’s about humans failing to be better.”

That was my bullet. Sideways shot. Loid Forger energy. Knocked the prize clean off the shelf.

The crowd goes silent. Banter about Batman stops. Even Hulk pauses.

Act III: The Exchange

Hulk, still half in character, half not, replies:

“EVENTUALLY RETURNS! WHEN AI BUBBLE PASSES! PEOPLE GET RELOCATED! FIND OTHER JOBS! BUT HULK UNDERSTAND HOW YOU FEEL!”

And I sip, nod, and close the booth with a smile:

“Fair enough, Hulk. 🍷 I’ll sip my wine and let the future prove us both right in its own way. 😉”

No rage. No fight. Just polite execution. Truth dropped, silence ringing, wine glass tipped.

Act IV: The Risitas Laugh

Because here’s the joke:

• The video was about celebrating a bloodbath.
• The crowd wanted Hulk smash takes.
• I dropped one sideways truth, and the carnival froze.

And that silence? Louder than any roar.

🤣🤣🤣

Echoes of the Clap — The Layoff Silence

• Scene: Xbox layoffs clip
• Target: The cheering crowd.
• First Hit: 9,000 lives reduced to “efficiency.”
• Second Hit: Truth bomb reframing it as failure of humanity.
• Result: Silence. Hulk nod. No counter.

Alias: The Layoff Silence.

This is Gremlin Risitas #001. Not cruelty. Just clarity. Wine in hand. Chair tipping. Risitas laugh echoing through the empty booth.

🤣🤣🤣