Gremlin Risitas Entry #027 — Puppet Court
Sometimes the noise gets too loud. People bump gums, puff chests, and talk like they run the street corner, the bus stop, the world.
That’s when I reach into the trash bag… and pull out my correctional puppets.
🎭 Gaslighting Gary (wide eyes, floppy arms):
“Listen, buddy. You’re not mad, you’re just confused. The bus isn’t late, you are.”
🎭 Compromising Carl (cheap suit, permanent shrug):
“Look, let’s meet in the middle. You scream nonsense, I nod politely, and we both pretend you didn’t lose this argument in the first sentence.”
🐾 Mrs. Catford (from the director’s chair):
“Really, Jerry? Puppets?”
🐾 Mr. Catford (already chewing on Gary’s arm):
“They taste like polyester. I approve.”
🤡 The Clown (on the floor, wheezing):
“HAHAHA! He pulled puppets out of nowhere! Imagine losing an argument to sock theater!”
And me? I stay unferddled. Because nothing shuts down fake tough talk faster than realizing the raccoon brought props.
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