Gremlin Risitas — The Hall Monitor of Morality
Texas kicked open the digital door like a substitute teacher on a power trip. “Not on my network!” it yells, waving a Bible and a firewall at the same time.
Gremlin doesn’t even blink. Just slides out a VPN like a hall pass with attitude. Suddenly, he’s watching pixels from international waters, sipping Capri-Sun like a war criminal in leisurewear.
Texas is still shouting about values while the Gremlin’s already in twelve time zones, laughing in subtitles. Every “Access Denied” page becomes a suggestion. Every “Blocked” turns into “Bet.”
By the time Texas finishes its lecture, Gremlin’s router is wearing sunglasses. El Risitas is in the corner short-circuiting from laughter, and the only thing getting censored now is the Wi-Fi bill.
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