Jerry's Marginalia – Not Every Story Is Yours to Carry
Sometimes I'll watch a review, read a book, or listen to someone recount their past.
Sometimes those stories are ugly.
Poverty.
Addiction.
PTSD.
Failure.
Loss.
The storyteller lived it.
I didn't.
That doesn't make their story any less real.
But it also doesn't make it my responsibility to carry.
Empathy is important.
Compassion is important.
Neither requires me to inherit someone else's burden.
I can listen.
I can understand.
I can even learn something from it.
Then I can quietly set it back down and continue walking my own path.
Everyone climbs a mountain.
Mine isn't theirs.
Theirs isn't mine.
If I managed to climb one through patience, stubbornness, and yes—even spite—that doesn't invalidate someone else's struggle.
Likewise, their struggle doesn't define mine.
The older I get, the more I realize there is a difference between understanding someone and becoming responsible for them.
I don't have to relive every painful memory someone shares in order to respect that it happened.
I don't have to solve every problem.
I don't have to carry every burden.
Sometimes the greatest kindness you can offer another person is simply to listen.
Sometimes the greatest kindness you can offer yourself is knowing when to stop carrying what was never yours.
Not every story is yours to carry.
Sometimes it is simply another page in someone else's book.
Read it.
Learn from it.
Turn the page.
— Jerry
Further Reading / Source of Inspiration
I watched Absolute Unit's review, "Chain Smoker Reviews Chainsmoker Cat," which inspired the thoughts behind this Marginalia. Whether you agree with my perspective or his, it's worth hearing another point of view.