R.A.B.B. Entry #001 — The Lock That Lies
Commercial pitch: "With this high-powered 30 caliber rifle, we’re going to blast open this Master Lock model number 15."
Boom. Hole straight through.
Narrator purrs like nothing happened: "We blew a half inch hole clear through, but the Master Lock still holds tight."
Translation? Believe in the lie until it sells. Because the sharpshooter didn’t take the side shot. A side shot would’ve ended the commercial in three seconds flat with a busted lock on the floor. No drama. No product. No sale.
So they built a circus. Aim center-mass, make noise, let sparks fly — but never, ever prove the weakness. That’s not marketing, that’s theatre.
🐾 Mrs. Catford Commentary: “Center shot = show. Side shot = truth you don’t want to sell.”
And people bought it. Literally. Master Lock sold millions off the illusion of being “tough under fire.” Not because the lock was invincible — but because they staged a bullet hole that looked impressive without revealing the soft belly.
That’s bureaucratic bullsht 101:
- Create the test you know you’ll pass.
- Ignore the one that proves otherwise.
- Call it toughness.
- Cash the check.
And the crowd applauded. Because sometimes, the lie feels stronger than the truth — especially when it’s framed in crosshairs.
#RABB #BureaucraticBullsht #MarketingMyth #BulletproofIllusion #CatfordClaws