🪓 You Want Loyalty? Offer a Future.

20 Jun, 2025

LinkedIn Lobotomy // Exit Interview with the Cult

Every toxic workplace eventually mutters this line:

“We just want someone who’s loyal.” But what they really mean is: “We want someone who won’t leave—even when we stop trying.”

They dangle “loyalty” like it’s a virtue. But what they’re really asking for is emotional hostagehood— Stay late. Do extra. Take the hit. All for the promise of… maybe next quarter.

🧠 The Reality of Loyalty You want real loyalty? Give people a reason to stay.

That means:

Raises that match the workload.

Promotions based on execution, not favoritism.

Managers that listen, not just nod.

Don’t talk to me about loyalty if:

You can ghost me after years of service.

You can cut me on Friday and post the opening on Monday.

You pay me “competitively” while driving a Tesla.

🚪 “We’re Like Family” Nah. A family doesn’t fire you by email. A family doesn’t gaslight you into working holidays. A family doesn’t ask you to sacrifice your health for quarterly numbers.

That ain’t a family. That’s a cult with a PTO policy.

🔒 The Glitch Contract I’ll be loyal—to the mission. I’ll be consistent—to the craft. I’ll show up—until I outgrow the cage. But I will never confuse a paycheck for a promise.

If you want my future?

Offer one.

Otherwise?

I'm clocking in, clocking out, and building my empire while you brag about retention on LinkedIn.

💢 Final Word: Loyalty is earned. Not extracted.

Give me vision, not slogans. Growth, not guilt trips. A roadmap, not manipulation.

Because I don’t stay where I’m tolerated. I stay where I’m invested in.

#BearBlog #GlitchDoctrine #LoyaltyIsMutual #WeAreNotAFamily #MissionOverMascots #LinkedInLobotomyFinale #BrokeDoctrineEndgame #ClownWasPackingUpToo